Let’s face it, the last few years have been a hot mess for teachers. It’s been incredibly difficult to navigate. We know that trauma-informed practices are needed now more than ever to help shift our engagement with one another — but how to make these practices work is the question. Learning how to communicate differently is the answer.
I started my teaching career bright eyed and bushy-tailed. I was ready to change the world. I wanted to help challenge the status quo and the systemic inequities in the public school system. And then I got my first teaching job in the U.S. Yikes.
Over the next 20 years, as I held various roles in public education, I found many well-intentioned educators and I encountered many students who were excited to learn. I also found many students who were frustrated, disengaged and sad as a result of trying to navigate a dysfunctional education system. I found pockets of hope and innovation, but not enough to satisfy me. So I went back to school for my doctorate to learn how organizations can change - really change.
I studied organizational psychology, systems thinking, design thinking, agency, self-organizing systems – and I ultimately realized that all of the initiatives in the world could not change how we work. I realized that how we interact with each other at the most basic level sets the stage for the success of initiatives.
It was then I started reading about communication and how people talk to each other. I began studying conflict and learned about the ladder of inference. I reflected with colleagues on the language we use at work. When we talked about conflict, I noticed how most recoiled at the word. “Ick!” they said..“I don’t do conflict at work! I avoid all that drama.”
What if educators could use healthy communication with students who were struggling with their behavior? Or with irate parents?
Restorative practices are being incorporated more and more often. Schools could be a wonderful place if we could all say what we felt and needed in a healthy way. Enter Nonviolent Communication (NVC), an approach to communication developed by Marshall Rosenberg.
I began an avid study of NVC, reading everything I could, practicing the techniques, watching videos and documentaries, practicing the techniques, attending workshops, and practicing some more. I visited a school in Sweden that uses NVC. I attended lots of trainings. I got feedback about my language skills.
So after nearly 30 years in education, I realized that it comes down to this: helping educators learn these restorative communication skills is the necessary first step in order for students and adults in trauma-informed schools to prosper. I’ve taken all I have learned about NVC and organized it into a course that uses relatable, effective strategies that increase awareness and nurture students’ and adults’ innate desire for calm while feeling heard, understood and supported.
Are you ready to learn more?
Drawing from the highly effective Nonviolent Communication method, restorative communication demonstrates how to increase awareness of yourself and others, identify feelings as they relate to behavior and needs, and employ practices that lead to positive outcomes. It works hand in hand with restorative practices, such as Talking Circles.
When modelled in the classroom, restorative communication empowers students to learn from their actions, to understand their impact, and to grow personally in their ability to make more sound decisions and resolve problems.
Resolve conflicts and disagreements in a respectful and cooperative manner.
Take responsibility for one’s feelings and behavior.
Intentionally engage in acts of kindness, forgiveness and support of others.
How to Start Restorative Communication in Trauma-Informed Schools is a 6-module online course designed for teachers to learn and apply a four-part communication framework to their own relationships and then model / teach the principles to their students.
You can dive into the program for a full 30 days and experience the power of effective, productive, and healthy communication with your school staff, students, and parents. If you are not satisfied with the results, you can request a refund within 60 days. This entire program is designed to help you put the four-part communication framework into action. You will be asked to share your implementation and results in the program to qualify for a refund.